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What CAN I Do??!
By: Connie J..., June 27, 2023
I used to be a “fixer”; and uber codependent. I tried to save EVERYONE around me from suffering…well…ANY kind of emotional pain.
This led to me, basically, “absorbing” a LOT of pain and suffering from everyone around me – and it didn’t really lessen THEIR suffering – we BOTH ended up miserable. Trust me, that can wear on a person – REALLY fast, and go deep.
I finally learned (and still get little lessons, periodically) that it is NOT my job to fix things (or ANY other person’s, either). It’s the individual’s choices – AND responsibility.
Our job is to be available for others, to form relationships to support one another – like a bridge. Ever really looked at one? They have the basic platform; but there are usually cables, or extra beams, etc, to support that platform – how droopy and quickly worn down would it be, without all that support??! Not a bridge that I would like to go over.
But, there is a way to be supportive, without getting enmeshed in someone’s suffering. Empathy is one great tool – but pity is counterproductive.
For example, the empathetic individual comes along beside, and supports them – like those cables or beams on the bridge. A team effort; while pity would only add more strain and weight to that already droopy bridge/person.
It’s okay if you cannot help EVERYONE. My theory is, if everyone in the world could be kind and help ONE person, all the world’s problems could be solved – but the small “handful” of kind individuals are trying to solve ALL the problems.
Realistically, all you can do, is what you CAN do – and only you know what that is. By the way, being guilty into doing things, only makes you resentful – something else that is counterproductive.
The NUMBER ONE thing you can do, is keep trying…
Thank you, and have a good day, and be safe in this upcoming New Year…
#oneinfour #ithappenstomentoo #dviseverywhere #domesticviolence
*October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Please share this post, no matter what month it is, to help get the word out. The Victim has to make the choice – but, “What If…” they read something you sent them, and it just “clicks”?
*I generally share a “What If…” post, on the first post of every month, and I would love the opportunity to share YOUR “what ifs”. Please send your “What If…” ideas to Connie J… – beamererin@yahoo.com; or through Ozer, at the website ozerministriesinc.com, or email, ozerministries@att.net.
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