It's Not Loyalty...

 By: Connie J..., June 7, 2024

...I seek from people. That can vary too much, according to each person's perspective - which is usually different for each individual, because of it's many levels.


I seek commitment - that WE'RE going to work through the hard times, celebrate the good times; and just be there for each other for everything else - we're working on this together.


This post was inspired by a former friend that actually believed that if someone had a negative opinion of her, and I heard it and didn't speak up, that I wasn't considered "loyal". What's next - are my "knees in danger"??!

I, or she, has no control over what ANYONE else believes about a certain person, or situation. It's actually no one else's business, amiright??!


That doesn't mean it might not be a little painful; but then it's time for introspection into what is the truth. If there are changes to be made, that is up to the individual; whereas, if they don't see a problem, then that, again, falls on them.

We're to live our own lives; all anyone else can add, is their opinion, and that's where it ends.


I think that's one reason people struggle with Domestic Violence situations - they're seeking "loyalty" from their partner, instead of commitment, at the cost of themselves.


Maybe it's time for a little introspection into the truth? I'm in - challenge accepted...

Thank you, and have a good day, and be safe... #ENDtheSILENCEofVIOLENCE #besafe #dviseverywhere #domesticviolence #growin2024 #awareness #protectyourself #commitment


*October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Please share this post, no matter what month it is, to help get the word out. The Victim has to make the choice - but, "What If..." they read something you sent them, and it just "clicks"?

PREVIOUS POSTS

By Connie J... August 30, 2026
I hear so many people say things, like, "When ___ happens, I'll be ready to ___.", or "If only I could ___, then I'd be ready for/to ___.", etc. They're looking/waiting for something external to cause the change. Like "The Good Witch of the East" told Dorothy and her crew; what they needed was inside them, all along. It's the choices you make EVERY day, both good AND bad, that compound and create your life. If you're not happy with how your life's going, what choices can you make, RIGHT NOW, to change your life's trajectory. To quote Erin Brockovich, "Superman is not coming."  What are YOU gonna do to bring about change??!
By Connie J... August 10, 2026
Often, when I feel that desperate urge to help someone (especially if they have NOT asked for it), I have to stop and ask myself, "Who am I doing this for??!". Having been such a people-pleaser for so long, I gotta check my motivation. Sometimes, doing something for the wrong reason, is as ineffective as not doing it, at all. I mean sure, who CAN'T use help, almost always - but I'm scoping further out - am I coming between them, and a very valuable life-lesson? Have they landed in this particular situation due to the life-choices THEY have made; and if I swoop in and help them, am I robbing them of that life-lesson??! While THAT really isn't my choice to make - my helping them, is. If I feel compelled, like in my bones - yes; but if I have a "catch" - you KNOW what that is, perhaps I need to just step back. You cannot be controlled by whether they get mad, or not - follow YOUR feeling, and do what YOU need to do. Have you ever found yourself in this kind of predicament? How did yours play out? 
By Connie J... August 3, 2026
Often, when I feel that desperate urge to help someone (especially if they have NOT asked for it), I have to stop and ask myself, "Who am I doing this for??!". Having been such a people-pleaser for so long, I gotta check my motivation. Sometimes, doing something for the wrong reason, is as ineffective as not doing it, at all. I mean sure, who CAN'T use help, almost always - but I'm scoping further out - am I coming between them, and a very valuable life-lesson? Have they landed in this particular situation due to the life-choices THEY have made; and if I swoop in and help them, am I robbing them of that life-lesson??! While THAT really isn't my choice to make - my helping them, is. If I feel compelled, like in my bones - yes; but if I have a "catch" - you KNOW what that is, perhaps I need to just step back. You cannot be controlled by whether they get mad, or not - follow YOUR feeling, and do what YOU need to do. Have you ever found yourself in this kind of predicament? How did yours play out? 
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