Being babied and coddled, LONG past the age I should have been held accountable for my actions; I wasn't raised to "handle" or "deal with" anything. I would just shed a few tears, and get my way. I now understand, it was because I was SUCH an inquisitive and "noticing" child. I also asked, "Why?", a LOT. That "babying" and "coddling" was just another layer of deceit, in my life. It took away my "superpowers", for MANY years. I was never going to get the answers I sought, so why keep asking the questions? But, although I didn't consciously ask; I still paid attention and observed. Over the years, I have come up with many right answers, on many painful issues. I believe, there's only ONE way I could know a lot of what I "just know". Then I started sharing the truths I discovered; though awkwardly, at first - I stayed engaged in sharing those truths. I hurt, and lost some people - but though it was painful, I knew that NOT sharing those truths was hurting ME even more. I wish some of the people who were involved in that deceit, some who are no longer with us, could have explained some things to me. I still ask "Why?" - but it echoes, and eventually fades away. I know it doesn't really matter, anyway; but others accountability would have been cathartic to see. I will continue to speak my truth - though I still get in trouble, sometimes; and they try to quiet me. Hmmm - good luck with that. My "Pandora's Box" has been opened - never to be closed, again. As I've stated, before, I WAS raised in a Domestic Violence situation; and much of what I'm still piecing together, is a direct result. Speaking my truth, is doing MY part to "END the SILENCE of VIOLENCE"!!!  What can you do? What is YOUR "superpower"??! Thank you, have a good day and be safe... #beaware #growinto2025 ##domesticviolenceiseverywhere #ENDtheSILENCEofVIOLENCE #isityou everybodyknowsomebody #besafe ***October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Please share this post, no matter what month it is, to help get the word out. The Victim has to make the choice - but, "What If..." they read something you sent them, and it just "clicks"?*** *I would love the opportunity to share YOUR ideas in a Blog post. Please send them to Connie J... - beamererin@yahoo.com ; or through Ozer email, ozerministries@att.net .

...just bouncing from event, to event, in your life? Sometimes, that's how I feel. I am very "date triggered" - and the irony is, that this started AFTER I began my healing process in 1992. The first big date I remember, after that, is December 27, 1995 - the day my Grandma died. Some of these dates, while still major, I am able to work; others they still hit so hard, I can't work. I take the day off to remember, and reflect. One example, 9/11/01 ‐ I worked it '02-'04; but in '05, after going to work in the AFTERNOON of '04, and mentioning it to someone, and they said, "Oh yeah, that IS today, isn't it?" - I vowed to never work another 9/11 - and haven't. While I DO respect everyone's right to how they think and feel - I will NEVER forget, nor will I work that day. I feel like it's MY job to remember. I think part of it is, growing up, everything that was traumatic, you just swept under the rug and moved on - it was never processed. I have now learned to process EVERYTHING; and am able to prioritize what matters to me. Many people don't understand why I do what I do; but that doesn't bother me - and what few people DO understand, while I may "honor" certain dates by pausing to reflect and remember - I HAVE moved on from them, and this is all part of MY process to do just that. I am ok; and doing what I NEED TO DO in my life. No one else can control me - THAT IS HUGE!!! Being controlled by someone else's responses, moods, feelings, etc, is a DIRECT result of growing up in a Domestic Violence situation; and I am NOT that person, anymore. So, if I "Pinball" my way through life, so be it. I have a CHOICE with EVERY target I bounce off of.  Does any of this connect to something in your very soul? We would love to hear YOUR thoughts on being a "Pinball"... Thank you, have a good day and be safe... #beaware #growinto2025 ##domesticviolenceiseverywhere #ENDtheSILENCEofVIOLENCE #isityou everybodyknowsomebody #besafe ***October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Please share this post, no matter what month it is, to help get the word out. The Victim has to make the choice - but, "What If..." they read something you sent them, and it just "clicks"?*** *I would love the opportunity to share YOUR ideas in a Blog post. Please send them to Connie J... - beamererin@yahoo.com ; or through Ozer email, ozerministries@att.net .

Have been thinking a LOT about this, lately. I recently spent some time with a close friend, and they made a comment, that in the past, would have changed my whole "thought-process trajectory". Pretty much any response they made to ANY expression of how I felt, about many things, would cause me to just adapt MY feelings - and shut them down, basically; thereby, making myself smaller, and invalidating how I felt - sound familiar??! I really care about them; and I want them to really see, and understand me, like I THOUGHT they did at one point. But, life has taken us different directions; and I wonder if we ever really had that relationship I believed we did. Was it ALL in my head??! Which brings me to "Growth Spurts". In that recent conversation, they shared that something I was doing made them feel like I was giving a "canned, impersonal response". I told them, if that's what they really believed; then they didn't know me as well as I thought they did - but I did NOT back down!!! Although, it DID take me a couple days, to get my groove back; did I mention that I DID NOT BACK DOWN??! That, my Friend, was a major "Growth Spurt"!!! When something happens, and you can look in the past and realize you responded differently "than you always did" - THAT'S a "Growth Spurt"!!! Have you ever had that kind of thing happen? I hope so - in looking back, how long did it take YOU to figure out that growth? Not gonna lie, it sometimes takes me a minute (or seven)...but then, there's that moment of euphoria, that just takes your breath away. The down-side, it's often followed by a major choice - are you going to stay in that growth, and keep growing; or are you going to revert back to old habits - which never quite satisfy, from that point on?  Just remember, you DO always have a choice...choose wisely!!! Happy Growth Spurts!!! Thank you, have a good day and be safe... #beaware #growinto2025 ##domesticviolenceiseverywhere #ENDtheSILENCEofVIOLENCE #isityou everybodyknowsomebody #besafe ***October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Please share this post, no matter what month it is, to help get the word out. The Victim has to make the choice - but, "What If..." they read something you sent them, and it just "clicks"?*** *I would love the opportunity to share YOUR ideas in a Blog post. Please send them to Connie J... - beamererin@yahoo.com ; or through Ozer email, ozerministries@att.net .

...wrong time. Ever been there??! My thought process for this - I was 20, at a gas station putting air in my tires. I had just filled both on the driver's side, as a car pulled up on the passenger side, really close - where I happened to be standing. There was plenty of room for me to stand there, safely, until they backed out - or so I thought!!! While backing out, they turned their wheel too sharply - knocking me to the ground, and scraping the entire side of my car!!! They, quickly pulled back in, while I was getting to my feet, and asked if I was ok. I said, "Yes"; and let them leave. I was basically in shock, right??! While I AM very happy I wasn't crouched down, filling a tire, at that moment, and it WAS an older car (my Mother called it "The Bronze Bomber"; so comparing before/after, damage was honestly minimal), AND I wasn't hurt - I still wish so many things: - they hadn't scraped my car - I had been on other side, so not knocked down - had maybe seen about their insurance info, etc, but I didn't - maybe held them accountable? - I had taken more time to CARE about MYSELF in that moment - they were a couple of kids; and I was more worried about them - even though I WAS THE ONE LAYING ON THE GROUND...sitting here, right now - I can recall so many situations with me having the same type of reaction, throughout my life!!! Have you ever had a similar type of situation happen to you? With Domestic Violence, you often don't know when your partner is going to go off. They seem to let the "big things" go; but blow up at the tiniest situations. Hmmmmm...insightful moment - that explains it - I grew up in that environment, and learned it very well, apparently. Wow!!! I knew I was a "recovering rage-aholic"; just hadn't looked at that situation from this perspective. Live and learn, right??! Let's GROW!!! Thank you, have a good day and be safe... #beaware #growinto2025 ##domesticviolenceiseverywhere #ENDtheSILENCEofVIOLENCE #isityou everybodyknowsomebody #besafe ***October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Please share this post, no matter what month it is, to help get the word out. The Victim has to make the choice - but, "What If..." they read something you sent them, and it just "clicks"?*** *I would love the opportunity to share YOUR ideas in a Blog post. Please send them to Connie J... - beamererin@yahoo.com ; or through Ozer email, ozerministries@att.net .

...with all of this chaos in my life??! While I THOUGHT I thrived in it - it was slowly, and methodically, eating me alive. This was one of THE HARDEST lessons for me to learn. I'm an extremely deep thinker; and I feel things to my very core. Every single thought in my head was screaming to be heard, at once; and I was in such all-consuming, emotional pain. Gratitude was THE FURTHEST thing from my mind!!! While on one of my "anger/confused" rants, (that had kind of become "my thing"), my friend grabbed both sides of my face in her hands, and said, "WHAT ARE YOU GRATEFUL FOR??!" (Hysterically, she was literally across the country, and we were on the phone - but this is my story, and I'm sticking to it!!!) It caught my attention, and stopped my rant dead in it's tracks; thus beginning my "grateful sojourn". While I don't remember what I answered; it did the trick - knocked my rant right off its' axis!!! You can listen to what people say, advice, etc, for years - but then one day, something someone says will just "CLICK" that switch inside you; and your whole life will change. Are you ready to have YOUR "switch" clicked? Are you exhausted from all that internal chaos consuming you, day by day? True change begins inside you - I encourage you, as soon as your eyes open (or even before), to think of ONE thing you can be grateful for, in your life.  It doesn't mean your life will necessarily change, in that instant; but what have you got to lose? Just start - and see what happens... Thank you, have a good day and be safe... #beaware #growinto2025 ##domesticviolenceiseverywhere #ENDtheSILENCEofVIOLENCE #isityou everybodyknowsomebody #besafe ***October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Please share this post, no matter what month it is, to help get the word out. The Victim has to make the choice - but, "What If..." they read something you sent them, and it just "clicks"?*** *I would love the opportunity to share YOUR ideas in a Blog post. Please send them to Connie J... - beamererin@yahoo.com ; or through Ozer email, ozerministries@att.net .